The man I’ve loved for eight years has asked me out?
When I was 16 I fell head-over-heels for a guy who was 24. He knew I liked him, but he said that he only liked me as a friend (age difference). I did my best to get over him, but we kept a friendship. We traveled to Thailand together, and to Japan, and our families became friends and would dine together. We’d go out to try new restaurants together (both of our families) and he came to all of our family parties, and our friends became accustomed to him and enjoyed his company. I tried to move on but the feelings were stuck there.
He was very busy in law school, too.
Now, I’m 24 and very successful and he’s also very successful (he’s 32 and owns his own law-firm). He’s asked me out, and I said yes.
He told me that when he was 24 he had liked me back, VERY much, actually. But it was just a bad timing. He had wanted to finish his education and be successful first (he wanted to be able to afford expensive jewelry for no reason, flowers, surprise tropical vacations, ballet tickets, and elite restaurants). The age difference was also way too big. He said that he had planned the whole thing. He had planned to pretend that it was nothing more than friendship but keep a very tight bond, and he had known that when I was older and stable, he wouldn’t hesitate to ask me out.
I’m happy that he asked me out, and I did say yes. But I’m bothered. How should I feel that he wasn’t honest with me? The age difference was too big, but couldn’t he have just said that the age difference was too big and he had other stuff to do, but that we should wait for eachother? Why the trickery? I suffered for him for eight years.
Am I overreacting? Should he have been honest? Or should I just be thankful that I accepted a date with someone responsible?
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